Friday, January 4, 2013

Stupid Bans - Australia Bans Small Breasts in Porn

Back at the beginning of 2010, the Australian Classification Board decided it needed to put an end to some of the more unsavory aspects of adult films and publications. First on their hit list was the depiction of any sort of female ejaculation. The Board felt these scenes were most decidedly deserving of a Refused Classificationbecause it was one of two things:
Urine, and thus banned under the label of "golden showers," or;
an abhorrent depiction.
We presume all the wives of the men on the Classification Board are having affairs.
Also in the Classification Board's sights for banned content? Breasts. Or rather, the lack thereof. If you were going to have naked titties, they needed to be big titties. By order of the Australian government.
"What's that, Skippy? Big titties? Also this joke is playing on a horrible stereotype? Good boy."
The reason is that an Australian group called Kids Free 2B Kids was leading a campaign to forbid women with an A-cup breast size from appearing in pornography, claiming it encouraged pedophilia, since apparently all flat-chested women are under the legal age of consent.
Pictured: a 15-year-old boy, apparently
As a result, depictions of non-voluptuous women in their late 20s have been banned, including those in mainstream publications like Hustler. Not only that, but according to Fiona Patten of the Australian Sex Party, "It may be an unintended consequence of the Senator's actions but they are largely responsible for the sharp increase in breast size in Australian adult magazines of late."
OK -- we think we've discovered an ulterior motive here.

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